Kinky Friedman Quotes And Sayings

Richard Samet “Kinky” Friedman is an American Texas Country singer, songwriter, novelist, humorist, politician and former columnist for Texas Monthly who styles himself in the mold of popular American satirists Will Rogers and Mark Twain. He was one of two independent candidates in the 2006 election for the office of Governor of Texas. Receiving 12.6% of the vote, Friedman placed fourth in the six-person race.

Beauty Is In The Eye Of The Beer Holder.

May The God Of Your Choice Bless And Keep You. I Respect Him As Long As He Does Not Circumcise Me Anymore.

Musicians Can Run This State Better Than Politicians. We Won't Get A Lot Done In The Mornings, But We'll Work Late And Be Honest.

If Willie Nelson Had Been Rosa Parks, There Never Would Have Been A Civil Rights Movement In This Country, Because He Refuses To Leave The Back Of The Bus.

I'm Too Young For Medicare And Too Old For Women To Care.

I Admit To Drinking It, But I Did Not Swallow.

You Struggle With Your Demons And You Conquer Them.

How Can You Look At The Texas Legislature And Still Believe In Intelligent Design?

Well, I Just Said That Jesus And I Were Both Jewish And That Neither Of Us Ever Had A Job, We Never Had A Home, We Never Married And We Traveled Around The Countryside Irritating People.

I Don't Apologize To People With An Agenda.

Remember: Y'all Is Singular. All Y'all Is Plural. All Y'all's Is Plural Possessive.

I Don't Remember The First Half Of My Life. All I Say Is A Happy Childhood Is The Worst Possible Preparation For Life.

The Folks In Mississippi Are Saying, 'Thank God For Texas.'

Politics Is The Only Field In Which The More Experience You Have, The Worse You Get.

Yes, I'm A Judeo-christian. Jesus And Moses Are In My Heart, And... Both Of Them Were Independents, By The Way.

And I Think Musicians Can Better Run This State Than Politicians. And, Hell, Beauticians Can Better Run The State Than Politicians.

I Even Went So Far As To Become A Southern Baptist For A While, Until I Realized That They Didn't Hold 'Em Under Long Enough.

I Just Want Texas To Be Number One In Something Other Than Executions, Toll Roads And Property Taxes.

We've Got To Clear Some Of The Room Out Of The Prisons So We Can Put The Bad Guys In There, Like The Pedophiles And The Politicians.

I Have A Better Head Of Hair Than Rick Perry; It's Just Not In A Place I Can Show You.

I'll Tell You Right Now. I'm For Prayer In School.

No, Nothing Has Changed In My Life At All, And Nothing Would Change If I Had Millions.

We Were A Country Band With A Social Conscience.

Money Can Buy You A Fine Dog, But Only Love Can Make Him Wag His Tail.

Young People Are The Key To This Election.

I Admit I Was Drinking A Guinness... But I Did Not Swallow.

I Don't Apologize To People Who Try To Intimidate.

If You Ain't Texan, I Ain't Got Time For You.

The Teachers Are Getting Screwed, Blued, And Tattooed By The System.

When I'm Governor... I'll Be The First Governor With A Listed Telephone Number.

I'll Sign Anything Except Bad Legislation.

I Support Gay Marriage. I Believe They Have A Right To Be As Miserable As The Rest Of Us.

We're First On Executions. We're 49th In Funding Public Education. We're In A Race With Mississippi For The Bottom, And We're Winning.

William Bennett Is My Patron Saint, One Of Them. Redd Foxx Is Another.

The Democrats And Republicans Are The Same Guy Admiring Themself In The Mirror.

I See An Issue I Like, And I Support It.

The First Thing I'll Do If Elected Is Demand A Recount.

I'll Keep Us Out Of War With Oklahoma!

Students Don't Know Who Mark Twain Was Because He Wasn't On The Test.

We've Had To Be Creative To Get On The Ballot.

These Days, There Are Many People Around The World Who Listen To The Songs That Made Me Infamous And Read The Books That Made Me Respectable.

A Happy Childhood... Is The Worst Possible Preparation For Life.

I Never Apologize For The Truth. And The Truth Here Is That Racists Come In Many Different Colors.

I've Always Said Money May Buy You A Fine Dog, But Only Love Can Make It Wag Its Tail.

The Only Currency I Value Is The Coin Of The Spirit. That's Very Important In My Life.

You Have To Pretend That Your Life Is A Financial Pleasure Even When Your Autographs Are Bouncing.